Whatever the reason, my telephone fell off the wall regularly, and I used tape and gum to effect repairs. When the handset gave up, I used my stereo headphones for the receiver. The phone wouldn’t ring anymore after I hard-wired my cassette player into the thing.
I had my reasons.
Eventually, there was no other option but to call NY Telephone and avail myself of the free service call, which I had been putting off for 7 months.
So, the telephone repair guy comes by and sees what should be a telephone but isn’t anymore hanging on the wall by a push pin. It’s not as if I could polish this turd, and I was embarrassed.
There was a short pause before he said anything.
“What color do you want, red or black?” “For what?” I ask. “Your new wall phone, and I gotta go down to my truck to get it,” I told the guy that I had 10.00 in my life, and I was sure I didn’t have the money to pay for a new phone.
“Was there some sort of payment plan?”
“Have you ever had a phone in your name?” He asked, and I had not. “Well, it doesn’t cost you anything.” And after a brief pause added, “What you did to that piece of equipment, you shouldn’t be allowed to have another.”
I began explaining my performance art but stopped when I noticed him staring at the dick in the picture just to the right of the phone.
I had made the image for a media studies assignment, “The Body as Architecture.” I got an A.
“I want to take a picture of the phone before you take it,” I said.
NY Telephone man said nothing as I raised my Polaroid Pronto and took two snaps. I handed one to the guy and said, “Maybe show your buddies at work?” He laughed.
He moved to take the phone but dropped it, which caused the ringers/bells to break off the chassis and roll off somewhere…
My cats loved those things.
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My name is Gerard Exupery, and my website is gerardexupery.com, where I sell my books, exhibit images, and post stuff like this. My stories are 89% true, with only the names changed to protect the innocent.
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Thorsten Wulff on 410 East 65th Street
Comment posted: 01/12/2023
Murray Leshner on 410 East 65th Street
Comment posted: 01/12/2023
I had a couple I took out of a phone decades ago but 'no pictures...so it didn't happen', if you believe the old cliche.
I also had a really stressful tech support job in the 80's on 2nd shift where I broke 4 or 5 black phone handsets (not the same day). The black plastic was a Barbie (or Ken) color inside!
The fix was easy...unplug the coil cord, Mark up the beige fractures in the plastic with a black permanent marker and swap handsets with one of the 1st shift desks that was empty at night. The swap was a helpful co-worker's recommendation. I think the marker touchup might have been my contribution.
:@=
Tim Bradshaw on 410 East 65th Street
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Karen McBride on 410 East 65th Street
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karen
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Reed George on 410 East 65th Street
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Gary on 410 East 65th Street
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jim witherspoon on 410 East 65th Street
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Alexander Seidler on 410 East 65th Street
Comment posted: 02/12/2023
Stephen Fretz on 410 East 65th Street
Comment posted: 06/01/2024